Week 4 - the fun continues......
Applause.
Hello and welcome back to the show "Confessions Of An Australian Slumdog".
TONIGHT:
How are the "Famous Five" coping after their numbers dwindle to only four after Christine's time is up?
What really happens on Republic Day and how do they react when they find out?
What's for dinner? Read as the volunteers get a real shock as Premilla takes charge in the kitchen.
Aaaaand who's really winning in the battle against the Big People and the Little People at school... stay tuned for after this sort break.
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Tiger Biscuits! Orange! Strawberry! Chocolate! Aaaaaaaaaand BUTTERSCOTCH! A Perri Favorite! Only Rs. 15 per pack! (From all good Indian market sweet stalls.)
Big Plastic Buckets! Good for hand wash laundry, showering and pet frog storage! Avaliable in 5 new colours - pale pink, pale grey, pale blue, pale green and off white! Handwashing skills not included.
Tongs! Handy stainless steel kitchen tongs. Only Rs. 20. Looks amusing. Perfect with stainless steel kitchen chai cooking pot! Get your name engraved on it for free at no extra cost (correct spelling not a guarantee).
5 Rupee 5 Rupee 5 Rupee 5 Rupee 5 Rupee 5 Rupee 5 Rupee - not sure what exactly is 5 Rupees but I sure enjoy hearing about it as I walk through the market - 5 Rupee 5 Rupee 5 Rupee 5 Rupee
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Today is Friday, 29th Jan 2010. Bertina is upstairs reading her umpteenth book. Gillian is sighing on the couch next to me up to her elbows in luggage, note paper and her disobedient phone. Alyce is out and about on the medical van. I just got back from the "Internet Cafe" that did not have internet. It also doesn't sell tea or coffee or food so it's not a Cafe either. Thus (as Regan would put it) I just got back from the "........ ....". Gillian just moved her sighing from the couch to the lounge room floor mattress. I love that thing. The time is India Time 4pm... sorta.
On Monday - School Day. Republic Day practise and Exam Preparation for the kids. As unit test time draws near the children spent Monday re-reading their Questions and Answers, practising craft and generally sitting around. The kids and I had a lot of down time at school so it was nice to be able to float from class to class and hang out with some of the kids as they study. These kids are fairly studious, especially the Scholarship Class. The Scholarship Class are the only kids in the school who are actually sponsored by CFI. So 7ish children out of approximately 200 are sponsored in this school. Rs 600 (approximately - don't quote me) cash is distributed to the children to cover their personal costs. It is blatantly obvious how much Good this income does for their education as these kids are always well equipt, clean and tidy for school and they genuinely care a lot about their studies. These kids are recommended for scholarship by the school principal and it does a world of good for them. All in all, I really didn't get much teaching or work done but I think that Just Being Around the kids is beneficial as I can keep them out of trouble and give them some one-on-one tuition.School ends at 1.30pm. Sharad picks me up and takes me back to the house to take lunch. (In India you don't "have lunch" you "take lunch" I think this is a translation phrasing. I currently find I am unable to use complicated sentences or correct sentence structure because nobody understands me otherwise. Because different language - short sentence good. Easy concept good. Less words good. *headwobble*). After lunch Sharad took me to a readymade clothing store to buy myself and Alyce a white dress/top for Republic Day. It is my only readymade piece from Pen. Everything else is tailored.
Tuesday - Republic Day. Gillian got back from Varanasi. Visited the Child Haven Orphanage.
Expected to start at 8am the Mother Teresa English Medium School Republic Day ceremony began on time at 9.20am and ended five minutes later (so at 9.40am). Alyce and I wore 100% white Indian clothing to the ceremony. All the children were wearing their white uniforms, most of the teachers were in all whites and Sharad was in his white pants and white top with white embroidery flowers in white. White. They all loved the fact that I was there and seeing me in the correct white outfit was even more of a buzz for the kids as I think they understand more clearly than the adults that I am a foreigner. During the set up for the Republic Day ceremony the children were all in nearly neat rows, plastic flower arrangements where dusted down and re-re-repositioned to be in the centre of the table, a circle was artistically drawn around the flag pole in Indian flag colours with coloured powder (I can't for the life of me remember what this is called), a rock, a coconut and a water jug were also placed at the flag pole and Alyce and I watched a teacher write "REPUBIC D-" on the blackboard. Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY". Erase it. Write "REPUBLIC DAY"...
At about 9.30am Madam (School Principal) showed up with two official-looking men. Alyce and I were at the very front of the arena. A servant gave the red powder bindi and the men did the Hands Over the Smoke thing. They battled their way through the nearly neat rows of students and came to the front. A bearded VeryImportantLookingMan began to smash the coconut (this happens a lot) over the rock in an attempt to crack it. The students were all standing at Attention. Very proud and Serious Moment. Mr. VeryImportantLooking knocked the water jug over with the coconut much to my amusement. No one dared to laugh. After Mr. VIL cracked the coconut he washed his hands with the remainder of the contents of the water jug. Speeches, speeches, speeches... Alyce and I moved to the back and were given steaming hot cups of Chai. I was then ushered into the school during the Sports Awards (I want one) to eat Vegetarian Samosa's. Delicious. Sharad had left to hail us a rickshaw so in my haste and worry at missing or being overcharged for the autorickshaw I slipped the food into my satchel bag. (The bottom of my day/satchel bag is littered with crumbs and peanuts and remains of various foods that I had to hide. I am considering carrying a pot plant around to water so I can avoid drinking tap water.) Naturally, three more samosa's appeared on my stainless steel plate.
Soap Factory. Pottery Factory. Oil factory. We caught the government bus (Rs 20) and Sharad's two nephews came along to chat with their uncle and say "hi". Cup of Special Chai (Rs. 10).
Back home for lunch and Surprise Twist of the week - Gillians white Birkenstocks were next to the front door. Yay! We all ran in and naturally, she was asleep. A common occurrence in the Pen Family Household.
Child Haven.
Gillian, Alyce, Bertina and I were taken by Sharad to Child Haven Orphanage nearby. We first met Beth, a Canadian Volunteer who was a Cultural Social Worker or something and was going to be in India for 3 months so that she can go back to Canada and talk about her experience with helping out at Child Haven. We all had such a fantastic time at Child Haven. The children were simply gorgeous. One big family. They all sang us a few Indian songs... In exchange we sang the Australian National Anthem. Bertina and I did the alto to soprano as Alyce and Gillian did bass. Hilarious.
Alyce and Gillian then took the boys outside for some cricket while I ran Drama games inside such as Wizz Bang Pop, the Hand Floor tapping game and when they still weren't understanding me I started Bomb Squad (previously thought this was called Bongo).
We weren't there long as the children have a tight schedule of study and eating time &c. From what I could see the orphanage was run in extremely capable hands, the children were kind, affectionate and very camera shy. All of us, the Pen Family, were sad to leave. Alyce donated pens and stickers and such. We had a fantastic time.
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FINE: Pure & Safe - with added minerals! Packaged Drinking Water. Manufactured By: Pure Water Beverages, Goa. 1Litre. MRP Rs. 15.
EVEREST Tea Masala! A Perfect Blend Of Pure Spices. Rs. 15. 1/4 tsp of Everest Tea Masala will suffice for 2 cups of tea.
Thumbs Up! Drinking Cola by the Coke Company! (not to be confused with Real Coke.)
Harry Potter And The Goblet of Fire on DVD in HINDI Rs. 99 (expensive)
Plaster Ganesha statue from Pen, genuine, small size wholesale at Rs 50.
***
Wednesday - School day - kids had exams. The first time in 4 weeks that I have actually gotten bored or wanted to do something else. At least I got to keep the kids from cheating or moving from their seats. If I didn't do it - they'd be hit. During the exam.
Sandhya came by for lunch - it's always nice to check in with Sandhya. Even if only to converse with a fluent English speaker who has correct sentence structure.
Thursday - School had exams so I skipped it and went shopping in Pen with Sharad, Bertina and Gillian. Hilarious.
I have been wanting to get some evening Western clothes made for me. Sharad takes us to the good Lakshmir Tailors (a family of reliable muslim men with Singers). Normally it costs Rs 100 for the traditional pants and dress Indian combo. My Western dress (which SHOULD be really simple) that I designed myself for the Fenner Hall Commencement Dinner will cost Rs 200 for the tailoring. The fabric was Rs 350 for 6 metres. Will possibly only need half of that for my dress. Will use excess fabric elsewhere. So good. As soon as I get this dress (and if I am happy with it) I will put their kids through private school getting dresses made of my own design in my next 2 weeks. The dress I designed is inspired by a sari choli I saw. The exception is that the neckline isn't up to my neck - it's a real Western neckline that is flattering instead of incredibly, overwhelmingly modest - and that it is a short dress. So really - a long choli. Choli's are something these tailors are used to making so really in theory - my dress should be fairly easy. The language barrier (our tailors do not speak English) and the whole Western dress concept was mind boggling to our tailors. They wanted to know how I wanted the pants to be for under my dress! They could not even imagine a girl showing her knees in public. Sharad was very dad like explaining my drawing to the tailors and pointing to himself and the tailor as to where each bit goes (it is inappropriate for them to use me as the mannequin for the explaining) eg sleeve this length, skirt ending at this length, fitted section here, zipper (chain) this long, here... It was hilarious. Gillian wanted a wrap skirt made. To figure it out the tailor put it on and wore it! The girls and I laughed and laughed to see Our Family Tailor wear a skirt, learning it's design and function. Hahahahhaa.... aaaah... another Pen Family Moment... don't get me started on Gillians halter neck top explanation. Truly a classic moment in Pen History... wish Ms. Moser had been there. <3
On the way to the jewellery store we bumped into the Child Haven volunteers. Fancy that - the only two other white people in this part of the globe. We walked along and had a chat - they would join us for a special dinner at the Pen Family House and had to go back to the orphanage soon so we'll see you later. Gazing past one of many Hindu temples we removed our shoes on the steps of a reputable jewellry store that Sharad recommended. In Pen, since there are only 4 Westerners around (+2 with the Child Haven Canadians), one does not need to worry so much about the White Price. Even so, Pen economy is so small, I gladly hand over the extra Rs 10 when I suspect a markup; but who really knows how much Stuff is Worth? This particular store was fixed price according to the sign - phew, sometimes I miss that. We were served chai in a stainless steel saucer and cup. What they do is - they fill a cup with chai and place a deep saucer over the brim. The thing is then carried up side down so that the cup is sitting bottom up inside a deep saucer trapping the chai. This is great because it can't spill. Upon arrival, the cup is lifted up and the deep saucer is filled with chai. Half the chai from the deep saucer is poured into the cup and one person drinks from the deep saucer and the other from the cup. Be careful. It is always Steamingly Deadlyingly Pipingly Insanely Boiling Hot. Bertina, Gillian and I sat on the store couches as we waited for a large crowd of women possibly buying dowary gifts drinking chai for the umpteenth time that day. Behind the counter was Mr VeryImportantLooking(!) looking not so very important. (From the Republic Day Ceremony at Mother Teresa.)
Canadian volunteers, Beth and Margaret from Child Haven, came over for dinner. We had Chicken Masala! We actually got meat! (So excited.) Sharad, I think, was even more excited. He was definitely very "dad" today helping us buy jewellery and translate my dress drawings into Mahrathi for us. And there he was, on the kitchen floor (lots of cooking happens on the floor in great dishes) preparing us food. (We have a female cook and thus it was so funny to see Sharad participate in an action that belonged to someone else.... hard to describe unless you've lived it.) Of course, the women were vegetarians even back in Canada so Gillian and I just about wrestled over the table for these delicious chunks of well cooked authentic AUTHENTIC Indian Chicken Masala. I was blocked out the world around me in a pure moment of bliss where I was in my beloved Pen Family House/Bungalow surrounded by the girls I love - Alyce, Bertina and Gillian (and Christine in spirit), Sharad and eating this heavenly chicken IN INDIA. Couldn't have been more perfect. The sauce the chicken was in was a meal in itself. After the Canadian volunteers left I ate an extra chappatti in the chicken masala sauce and enjoyed The Last Piece of Chicken in the Pot solo. These small moments of bliss like eating the Last Piece and being Surrounded By Friends and Going to the Market are heightened by the fact that I am in India.
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Decorate your mudhut with an aquarium! Goldfish on sale now at the Fisherman's road off the main Pen market place. Follow the lady with the two parrots on her shoulder.
Humpy Head! Pour in Water To Encourage Hump on Head Growth for your Fish. (I am NOT kidding. I saw this in the Pet Shop.)
Spring; A Blue Bird Product! Large range of note books with printed Human Body fact sheet inside.(...Correct punctuations not a guarantee?)
Satchel bags and backpacks! Starting at Rs. 580 but I give you good price, you pay Rs 400.
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Today:
Friday - School day - kids had exams. Baby sitting really... Was pretty cruisy until the last 45 minutes of school.... Practised using my methods for keeping the class quiet which was a challenge because there was no work for them to do. The teachers just expected them to sit there quietly for 45minutes while the other kids did exams. I played some action games and started a drawing class but after half an hour the kids lost focus. Genuine babysitting. I tried to set up a naughty chair but the kids didn't understand that this was Punishment because chairs are for Teachers. !!!! ARGH! So I had to invent a Naughty Spot. But this classroom has no Spots because it is jam packed with tables and chairs. Worked well enough but only under supervision. I didn't mind that the kids were talking to each other but ever so slowly things got out of hand and the same 5 kids were asking me "can I move over here?","can i go into next class to see my brother", "can we play Super Loud Noise Game?"...&c even though sometimes i had no choice but to refuse them, they asked again and again and again... Really. Annoying... I explained my reasoning and told them to stop asking and that school ends in 10 minutes and it's not much longer just there are exams next door so shhhh read a book... but they didn't understand even the kids I didn't refuse still asked 5 times before doing it such as "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water???!" I ALREADY said yes so go drink water even so why would I possibly refuse and of course of one kid asks to drink water 10 more also ask and it is the same process again "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water?" "yes" "can I drink water?" "yes" and I was swamped by children showing me the same drawings again and again even though I had ALREADY given praise during the Drawing Class Time and in the pressure of trying to get these few kids to behave while good kids were also swamping me it drove me insane but i had to keep them quiet before someone came in to hit them and i was stuck and surrounded and kids were everywhere and nobody was looking and none of them cared what i had to say even if it was exactly what they wanted to hear and it was annoying and demanding and I honestly wanted to hit them I was gonna hit the ceiling right then... I shouted.
"Stand up! Arms in the air. All of you."
"Punishment?? Punishment teacher?!" 20 of them asked
"Yes. Punishment. Your hands are up so your mouth is shut. Back to your places."
Perfect Silence. Sasha Teacher rarely uses the Teacher Voice. We're in trouble. Teacher Voice is something you just sometimes Have To Have, if you can't acquire a Teacher Voice... you'll be fairly useless here.
To routine, Uncle Sharad picks me up from school, takes me to the house to take lunch.
In the afternoon, Bertina and I went for a walk through the marketplace for fun, samosa's and oranges (6 for Rs 100 - they over charge us differently every time). To understand what the market smells like you honestly have to be there. I will admit that the market is extremely dirty and of course you need to remove your shoes (and HOPE they don't get stolen) everytime you enter a shop like place. After 3 weeks my new $5 shoes I bought in Australia especially for India are utterly ruined as is the skin on my feet. People here spit constantly. (It spreads TB something epic but people either don't understand, know or care.) There is the occasional pile of off vegetables kept company by flies but these things are not important. I never even noticed the extent of the grime. Especially not while strolling through. The main market strip is one of my most favorite places in Pen. Occasionally you will get a decent whiff of market place incense. This dhoop is so deadly I bought a packet (Rs 15) for the folks back home just so I can explain the horridity of the fragrance. Endearing really.
NEXT WEEK how will the girls cope after Gillian leaves for sunny Goa? Will the internet cafe have internet? How many packets of free Parle-G biscuits from the biscuit factory will be left in the Pen House? Find out next week on "Survivor; Pen"...
Sneak preview for tomorrow's adventure:
Saturday - Alyce, Bertina and I intend to go on a day trip to Alibag AlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibagAlibag (as the bus conductors say - phonetically it's "are-lea-bag" - say it as fast as you can) for a boat ride. Should only cost Rs 20 for bus and Rs 100 for the boat, there is also a fort white entry is Rs 100 and Indian entry is Rs 5............ $AU1 = Rs. 42.....
Roll credits
This program is brought to you and owned by Sasha Perri TM
Cast:
Sasha Perri
Alyce Finch
Bertina Wong
Gillian Bowan
Christine Moser
Sharad
Sandhya
Special Guests:
The Child Haven Orphanage children and workers
Beth and Margaret the volunteers
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